COVID-19 has brought an economic apocalypse bearing down on the Capital City and the state

BY RICHARD JOHNSON

     Every fiscal conservative in Wyoming is soiling themselves right now.
     It's not a COVID-19 symptom, but it is ironic that toilet paper is about the only taxable item in Wyoming. We have no grocery tax and the price of oil is so low that even the Attorney General's Office is flooding

The Four Men of the Apocalypse bear down on Cheyenne and Wyoming.

with price gouging complaints. That circulated meme about “gas prices being so low, but I have no place to go” rings true.
     The pestilence horseman has come to Wyoming.

     "So I looked, and behold, a pale horse. And the name of him who sat on it was Death, and Hell followed with him.” Revelations 6:8

     Sure, I could be quoting "Tombstone" or Revelations (take your pick), but this is just another one-two punch at Wyoming's fragile economy. You know things are bleak when the Consensus Revenue Estimating Group (CREG) report is delayed. Economic projections are so low that they keep kicking the release can down the proverbial road.
     When unofficial results say the city of Cheyenne alone is facing a $14 million shortfall, it's going to take more than a state income tax and legalized marijuana to get this rider back on the horse.
     I can focus on Cheyenne, but this is a worldwide crisis. The stock market blows around like a Wyoming windsock, and no one really knows what's going on with this disease. Some think it's the apocalypse, and others think it’s a hoax.
     The unemployment in the first few weeks of this pandemic displays how dire this situation is and why political leaders are freaking out. No people working, no people purchasing, no revenue coming in, all things on the table.
     For those who get to keep their job, they will most likely lose their pension, 100 percent  contributions to their health care and most likely reduction in hours, forever. The part-time employees will go first before people start looking around the office at the seniority ladder. And there will be pay cuts, no doubt about it. Vacation? Forget about that!
     So what does a slashed $40 million annual budget look like? It looks a lot like longer turnaround time for permits, all recreational activities suspended, roads not getting fixed and government working even slower than before.
     Wyoming preaches small government until that 20 percent staff reductions have them in line for hours. With no state senator to call, they will likely jump on a conservative blog and vent about how inefficient government is and pontificate about how all will be right with the world if we elect the next conservative candidate.
     A silver lining to this plague is that, at least now, the average clerk down at City Hall can tell the line screamer to step back six feet.
     Ben Franklin said that the only certainty in life is death and taxes. Sadly, he wasn't thinking about crime. Crime is definitely a future certainty. Property theft, automobile break-ins and burglary are going to up faster than "no toilet paper" signs at the supermarket.
     For those of us who hoped warm weather would kill Rona, we will probably be disappointed as numbers of infected homies continue to increase. I'm not looking forward to the Plaza on walkie talkies saying, “Three people left, let three more in. That's it, cap is 50.”
     The fear of contamination will still be in the communal mindset, and any kind of event will take catastrophic losses.
     My health professional friends tell me there will be three months to normalcy, but my pessimistic crystal ball says three years. Instead of #weareinthistogether, I'm more of the mindset of #wereallscrewed. I guess I'll go back to posting Tiger King memes, senior photos, prom pictures, ab workouts and pushup challenges.

Richard Johnson is a former City Council from Ward 3 on Cheyenne’s east side.